And so it begins...

I never ever everrrr thought I would start a blog. I told myself I wouldn't...and shouldn't.. and couldn't. It's not even like I've had to fight the inclination to start one before this. And yet... here I am :P

What made me break down and feel compelled to publically write some of my thoughts and feelings out? I guess it was a realization tonight of just how good God is, how faithful and how blessed I am. I felt like I needed to share with others the... I don't even know which words to use - none can do God justice.... wonderful, amazing, gracious things He's done for me and how He's led me and protected me to bring me to where I am in my life right now.

Who I am... what I am... what I know and what I have.... everything is all by the grace of God. Looking back on even just the past 2 years of university... I marvel at how slowly but surely, God's been molding me and shaping me. I have more confidence in who I am and in who He is.... I'm more sure of where I'm going because of where I've been. I still don't know what profession I'll have... who I'm going to marry... if I'm going to marry. But I know with all my heart that God will never leave me.... will never stop wanting the best for me... and that I am safe in the palm of his hand. He is faithful forever... even when I am not faithful to Him. His mercy and grace are sufficient and he has shown and told me this countless times. God is GOOD. (understatement.. but true) :)

I could easily continue and share my whole lifestory on this blog right now, but I must remember why I didn't want to start a blog in the first place.
1) I'm really really really cheung hay (long winded)... and each post could easily be a few pages in Microsoft Word.. if I let myself go on and on and on like I am capable of :P
2) Once I start writing... I'm afraid I won't be able to filter things that are appropriate to write down for all to see, and things I should keep to myself or close friends and family. I love sharing things with other people, but wisdom is needed a lot of the time. I'm afraid that when I'm angry or upset, I'll post something that I'll regret later on. I think this blog has the possiblity of turning into a venting journal for me, which is definitely something I don't want to happen.
3) I'm afraid of spending/wasting too much time blogging when I should be doing other things with my time (i.e. studying.. or sleeping)
4) I just didn't want to conform to everyone else since the whole world has a blog :P

but... all these reasons are overlooked because I really do want to share the amazing things God has done and is doing for me. And I think the encouragement to others (and myself) and the testimony of God's graciousness and goodness overpowers any and all of the above reasons.

And so... this ends post #1... as it is 4:05am and I need to sleep :)

Maybe I'll post more tomorrow... maybe not. I don't promise that I will regularly post.... nor do I promise that this thing won't be gone by next month :P Anything can happen though.... we'll see :)